Holiday Season

The day after Thanksgiving, our Christmas tree was up. I was too excited to wait any longer. This Christmas feels different, for so many reasons. The main one is Danielle. The second one is Brian is home to celebrate, and not in Iraq...yet. Looking back, yes, last year was a good day, especially since I was almost positive I was pregnant. I just hadn't had a BFP (big fat positive) to prove it yet. In fact, I had 3 BFN (big fat negative) before I got my positive test.

The holidays just have much more meaning to me now that we have a child. Christmas can still be about Brian and I, somewhat, but its now more about her. Danielle needs a special ornament, the new toys, getting to see the lights and decorations. I feel like a little kid myself HAHA I still think about the miscarriage over Christmas of 2005 but I have come to terms with it. That baby just wasn't the right time or place for Brian and me. I barely held it together when Brian was at NTC while Danielle was 3 to 8 weeks. How could I do an entire year of an infant without him? Um...I guess like I'm about to do in 2 months...

Anyway, I guess the point is I can see this holiday through Danielle's eyes. Or what I think it means to her. This lucky girl will have 3 Christmas holidays, starting at our house to Mammaw's to Grandma & Grandpa's. I already have toys for her under our tree!

I just truly couldn't imagine what it would be like for us to finally have a baby. As hard as it can be sometimes, I don't think my heart could be any fuller of love for my family.